While 'watching'* this most annoying of shows with the obsessed boyfriend -
Locke: What if I told you you could have anything you wanted. What if I said you could have anything in the entire world?
Sayid: I would tell you that the only thing I ever wanted died in my arms, and I'll never see it again.
Locke: What if you could?
Me: Is he going to make him watch "The Secret?"**
BF: You're an asshole.***
Me: Is this scene happening in the past, present or future?
BF: Well, see last season they were doing all the flashbacks and blah blah blah blahbitty blah and this year it's both the flash forwards and the Blah to the blah-blah, and ON AND ON, and all kinds of dizy-making description and explanantion-
Me: I didn't ask for a dissertation on the space-time-continuum of Lost, I just want to know in which part of time this scene is.
BF: You really have to see it from the beginning.
Me: You people always say that, but it's just a dressed-up tropical, sci-fi soap opera, and they've done that theme on Days of Our Lives since at least the early '80s.
I'm really never giving that show any more chances.
postscript: I'm getting this t-shirt made: "All who wander are not into Lost."
(*by this I mean mostly interrupting as much as possible, reading, fidgeting, yawning, watching him watch and generally distracting myself and others from watching it, which could be seen as a public service or act of charity.
**...that or they are going to fashion themselves a Golem, old Jew-schoolio. Either way, it's a lose-lose situation, but then, that's the title!