Wednesday, November 29, 2006


One of the benefits of the Site Meter is tracking the key words people have typed into search engines which have led them to your blog. Though this happens nearly every day, the last 48 hours have been the most abundant search period ever for this blog.

Here's what brought 'em (and sometimes where they came from):

-You fill up my senses (SUNY Fredonia)
-peris, fairies and goddesses (Hillegom, Netherlands. Figures, the Flemish are a bit "touched.")
-charm school (Westchester, IL)
-paradise we found was always frail (Austin, Texas. Always wanted to go there.)
-first birthday charm (Law firm in Indianapolis)
-snakes on a plane scientific analysis (Clark Cty. School Board, Las Vegas, NV)
-school thought for the day (State of Georgia/Board of Regents)
-charm school for lawyers (pharmaceutical research co., Malvern, PA)
-guam snakes 2006 (NYC)
-Portland escort Janessa
-aedh wishes for the clothes of heaven words (Dublin, duh.)
-charm school Christian (Texas? Shocking.)
-clean subconsious bhajan
-grendel snakes symbol (Dallas, Texas. Dang.)
-"thing for jewish"

The first four lines almost read like a poem or a choppy song lyric.

The presence of the Georgia School Board made me shudder to think of my sorry influence upon Southern children, particularly as the place it took them was the refrigerator guarded by greedy dogs (11/25 post).

Charm school alone or plus something, is a usual route here, for obvious reasons. However, a finishing course for attorneys was something altogether new and humorous to me. You doing a post-grad year there, Stitch?

Don't know what to think about the Ophidians in that US Territory, or what they might be up to in 2006. I had a pewter platter from Guam as a kid. No idea why or what happened to it. I'm sure that was a casualty of my mother's aforementioned Stalinist Purges. That's alright, it was a piece of junk anyway.

As for Janessa, despite the fact that we are from the same hometown, I never met her, nor do those words appear consecutively in any post on my blog. Anyway, I don't know why you guys always lose a nice girl's phone number. Oh wait, the search originated in Los Angeles, so that explains a lot. Janessa, don't take any wooden nickels.

Which brings is to the query from Athens as to the hygienics of the subconscious mind. I can't say boo about Yogi Bhajan's, but when I think about Janessa, well, let's just say there are demons in the Attic.

"thing for jewish," that about sums it up, though I've been off they jocks for quite a while now. Simple twist of fate, is all. Thanks for asking though, Tel Aviv.


Mike said...

As a wanna be Flemish person, I'm outraged. Good post!

steve said...

I'm surprised you didnt get some bites on "shoes" and "suckas"...

Grant Miller said...

If you're feeling particularly wicked you could post IP addresses.

kissyface said...

Mike - Then stop getting those flu shots.
Steve - I'm not a foot fetishist (hehehehehee).
Grant - What on earth does that do?

Citizen H said...

You want oddity, someone got me a hit while Googling "footage of hog baiting with dogs". Guess they mistook me for dogfighting, meth-cooking white trash in the next county east of here. My anti-Sarkozy screed last month keeps French hits coming in too.

whosyourhuckleberry said...

I continually get hits for "upside down mirror fuck" from all over the world...

kissyface said...

Citizen H -I'm at a loss. that's crazy.

Huck - Do you think it has anything to do with an old physics question I asked you, about flipping mirrors?

whosyourhuckleberry said...

That's exactly how they've found me, and I wish to hell I could see the looks on each of their faces as they treated to a lesson in physics instead of the pornography that they so desperately desire...
But, that is why I have an imagination...

kissyface said...

Huck -

so really, UDMF is an established fetish, though one I've never heard of. What does it entail, I wonder? Sounds like a simple case of "mirrors on the ceiling, pink champagne on ice, we are all just prisoners here, of our own device." If they aren't ceiling mounts, one has a difficult time explaining the upside-down-ness. This is where you come in, and really, I encourage you to take these colorful "real-world" examples and incorporate them into your lectures. You will have your students' rapt attention.

Perhaps there is an entirely 'other' explanation for the UDMF, but I've not let my own imagination go there just yet. Has mind blowing sci-fi porn possibilities.

Lastly, you do realize, old Bean, that by placing those prurient word on my blog, you have ensured my inclusion in their prurient searches. That's sort of like wiping the gum off the bottom of your shoe, and onto your friend's sneaker. But I don't mind.