Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Home Schoolin'

There is a right way -

This is one of the best blogs I've come across in a long, long time, and one that surely should be grabbed up by a publisher. I can't think of many books I'd rather own. I have added this gem to my sidebar, and will endeavor to learn and abide by the 1001 rules for my unborn son as they apply, because they are laid out by a father who is obviously thoughtful, strong, hip and kind.

I'm a big fan of Rule #16, #188 and #219 though I disagree to some degree about the sandal wearing. Still, how can I fault a man who lists Big Star's Thirteen (a personal favorite), as required listening and then pulls out quotations like this one?

“A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.”    Robert Anson Heinlein

Unfortunately, there is no link I found to take you directly to the beginning of the blog, so just wend your way backwards and feel the love.

Then there's the wrong way -

From The Smoking Gun--Meet the Bebees. Father Floyd, 48, and his son Justin, 21, were arrested last year (on different dates) in central Florida. As you can tell from the below mug shots, the Bebees are forehead tattoo enthusiasts. Another of Bebee's kids, Floyd III, is locked up until 2016 on a variety of felony convictions. And while the 23-year-old inmate has yet to get his head inked, he does have a swastika on his left leg, and the phrases "Time Served" and "White Pride"* on his right leg. Floyd Bebee, a father of eight, said that he has a tattoo on the back of his head reading "Got-R-Did." The ink on his forehead** cost $125 and took about 45 minutes to complete, Bebee said, adding that he was the family trendsetter when it it came to such head art. Bebee, who does odd jobs like home remodeling and demolition, said that his wife had a succinct response to his forehead ink: "You crazy," she said. Bebee noted that since his son's eyes are open in his mug shot, the photo does not reveal a hidden surprise: Justin has the words "Fuck" and "You" tattooed on his eyelids.

The 1001 blog allows submissions of your own rule. I think I'd add "Avoid tattoos altogether," and the two my step-dad often iterates, "Always keep a twenty in your wallet," and "It's just as easy to keep the gas gauge arrow on the right side of the middle line as it is the left."

*we can surely see why.
**I'm sure he means 'dun' in the sense of dull.


bulletholes said...

Love the Heinlein quote. I think its from "Time Enough for Love", and Lazarus Long.
He's the one that gave us "Brewsters Factor" if you recall.

Your step-da sounds dad used to say
"If you don't have the money to do it right the first time, then you sure don't have the money to do it a second time either"
and he always preached to "put it back where it belongs, not where you found it".

kissyface said...

I totally agree with that last bit of advice, which is similar to the way my mother raised me. She always insisted that things be left better and cleaner than you found them, especially when you're a guest in someone's home.

The 20-spot is just about having cash on hand in case you're in a pinch, but I agree with your dad's philosophy as it applies to home remodeling. Most people cut corners and make things look worse than they were before. I find it personally grievous when people tear things out of old houses to update them. They always look schlocky afterwards. Modern sensibilities are rarely sensible, I find. But I'm a snob, I guess.

I don't know Brewster's Factor, I'm afraid. Going to look it up now...

bulletholes said...

Thats inflation for you. In Scouts we learned to always have a dime for a phone call.
Tghat would be 550 calls on my current cell phone bill. Thats a lot of good turns daily!

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