Monday, June 26, 2006

He Should Work for Hallmark

Possibly the funniest greeting I've ever received for such an occasion:

"B and I will be in SF through Monday night, so I thought I'd wish you well before we go. Let me know if there will be a public celebration of some sort that we can attend. If so, I will perform the following ten duties in this order:

1. standard happy birthday greeting
2. friendly embrace with added twelve seconds
3. ass grab
4. run with wolves
5. vulcan mind-meld
6. malachi crunk*
7. 54 blocks**
8. name that accent
9. dry hump
10. kyudo,*** pavane and promenade

Maybe you shouldn't invite me.

D"

I will certainly have to hold him to this, though

* can only presume he means "crunch." or maybe the song became a dance.
** dunno what this one is. Jenga?
*** Huck, you probably practice that.

That's a man playing a pavane.

2 comments:

Huckleberry said...

Well, not the Japansese version, but I am an avid archer, yes...

Happy Birthday!

Do it right, or don't do it at all, or in other words, get em in...
Sounds like your friend's got the right ideas, though I'm troubled by the absence of "kegstands."
To each their own though...

Anonymous said...

Oh good lord. Is it your birthday? Did you tell me that? Why yes, it seems to be sandwiched between some layer of dreams in my hazy comprehension of the world. When?! For fuck's sake?! Today? Yesterday? Please god not Saturday, when the Bear and I blew you off!!! Ack!