Saturday, October 21, 2006

Failing to Meet My Own Standards, As Per Usual

I try not to indulge my vanity much, really I do. But I confess I really like getting carded, which has been happening constantly, of late. Even today at Trader Joe's, when I bought beer for tomorrow's bbq. The cashier said, when looking at my Oregon ID (that's right, I'm still not legit here) -
"I was in Portland that year, the summer you were born." I replied, "So was I!" He said, "You never called me back." I said, "My fingers weren't real dextrous that first year."

Also, when the hot young Aussie lad (brother of my friend and current employer), who's been flirting with me all week at work (and who finally convinced me to go out with him), insists I don't look much older than he is, I smile. Because I am weak-minded and highly susceptible to flattery. Then he smacked me on the ass yesterday while we were on the kitchen floor hooking up the new dishwasher. Well, I confess I liked that too.

What a pushover. I think he wants a green card. I told him I would, in that case, marry him, but that there would be absolutely no touching.

He said that didn't sound like a very appealing kind of marriage to him.

I agreed.

I've also threatened to have him deported.

His sister and her husband were in a bit of an uproar after we had our dinner Wednesday night. She told me she gave him a "stern talking to," that I was "the nicest girl, and (he) better not be up to any devilish heartbreaking tricks." I asked her if that really applies when I'm significantly older than he. She said, "In Australia, it's always the guy's responsibility."

He told her to get used to it, because we would probably be going out again.

Before he arrived on Friday the Thirteenth (which my horoscope said would be a lucky day), from Down Under, she said, "What if you and Anthony fall in love?" I said, "he's too young for me..?" She said, "But this younger generation of guys, they seem to be going for older women quite a lot these days, and he always has older friends."

Anyway, there's a bit of confusion, a little worry, and a lot of humor that has hit the household following our "date," if you can even call it that. I don't blame them.

Still, Ant and I have talked it over, and we're going to play a little joke on them in a while. Maybe a few weeks.

When we announce that I am pregnant.


GrizzBabe said...

" In Australia, it's always the guy's respnsibility."

I like Anthony's sister!

srchngformystry said...

my friend and i played the "im pregnant" game on a friend. came up with an elaborate story. carried on for WEEKS, and it was a fun time.

until she missed her period for nine months.

never touched that game again.

kissyface said...

Grizz - so sexist, but funny!

CS2005 - I can always hope... kidding. actually, it did occur to me i could be tempting Fate with that one.

steve said...

Sounds like good fun, but you are DEFINITELY askin' for it!!!

jt castleton said...

'twould be cruel to wish this prank to backfire, right?

Grant Miller said...

Allow me to help you install a dishwasher next time.

Anonymous said...

He'll wind up selling cars in West Covina. You can prevent that.

kissyface said...

No worries, Peteski, I'm no mantrap.

Grant, a magnanimous offer, if not a monogamous one.

JT - much as i want a bébé, now's no time for it. or did you mean backfire in a different way?

Steve - i'm axin' for it.