and no, i havent told november how i feel because quite frankly, i do not know how i feel. once i figure it out, i know i will eventually have to say something.
You've had this cookie for three years? That sounds a bit scary. Do you keep it in a jar or a cage or what? Is it on display on your fireplace mantle? Does it move around at night? Do you have to feed it?
Forgive me if I am being crude, but that fortune cookie reminds me of a female body part. A labia to be exact. The funny thing is before posting this comment, I went to Wikipedia to determine if I was using the correct term for the correct body part and discovered that someone has posted a picture (not an artist's rendering but a photograph) of their...genitalia complete with labels indicating the correct medical term of each part. For some reason, I thought this was very comical. Aren't you glad I shared?
Anyway, I think the fortune ifself is very poignant. Even if you add "in bed" on the end of it (as I often do with my fortunes), the sentiment still rings true.
Mike - the thing about dry things is, well, they are dry. So whereas the cookie is surely stale and unpleasant to the palate, it has held up just fine, as you can see in the photo, which I took yesterday. It sits on a white platter on my marble topped desk. Sure, sometimes it gets a little dusty, and I have to blow the cookie off, that sounds bad, but it is otherwise pristine. Like hard tack, but quainter. I don't feed it, it feeds me.
I think I've said too much already. A girl can't lay down all her cards at once. Good thing my deck goes higher than 52. I wish I were a guy so I could pee anywhere I wanted while standing up. That's real power. I'd like to meet the following: My great-great grandparents, the N. Oklahoma ones, not the Swiss gentry. My woebegone friendship with Adam G. The man who's going to be with me till we're retired to the porch swing sucking on glycerine tablets, and who still reads to me at night, while I rub his feet. My ambitions with commitment and discipline. The characters from old David Lee Roth videos. Hot carb on carb action. That fucker who keeps trying to take the bbq, in a dark alley, satan's minions, lilliputians, nigglers, pifflers, piddlers, snake-oil peddlers, cripples, do-gooders, truth-seekers, sweethearts, wandering minstrels, interlopers, robber barons, saints, sinners, people who snort and guffaw, holler and whoop, tender tender people with good hearts, and all my fat little babies. I like BUTTER! And Vitamin Z!
7 comments:
That's all very well and good, but WHAT are your lucky numbers??
i love that fortune.
and no, i havent told november how i feel because quite frankly, i do not know how i feel. once i figure it out, i know i will eventually have to say something.
You've had this cookie for three years? That sounds a bit scary. Do you keep it in a jar or a cage or what? Is it on display on your fireplace mantle? Does it move around at night? Do you have to feed it?
WOW. That is really cool.
Forgive me if I am being crude, but that fortune cookie reminds me of a female body part. A labia to be exact. The funny thing is before posting this comment, I went to Wikipedia to determine if I was using the correct term for the correct body part and discovered that someone has posted a picture (not an artist's rendering but a photograph) of their...genitalia complete with labels indicating the correct medical term of each part. For some reason, I thought this was very comical. Aren't you glad I shared?
Anyway, I think the fortune ifself is very poignant. Even if you add "in bed" on the end of it (as I often do with my fortunes), the sentiment still rings true.
Mike - the thing about dry things is, well, they are dry. So whereas the cookie is surely stale and unpleasant to the palate, it has held up just fine, as you can see in the photo, which I took yesterday. It sits on a white platter on my marble topped desk. Sure, sometimes it gets a little dusty, and I have to blow the cookie off, that sounds bad, but it is otherwise pristine. Like hard tack, but quainter. I don't feed it, it feeds me.
G-Babe-
you're a naughty girl. don't stop.
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